May 7, 2009

l bin, everyone loves when you post, no one is annoyed. the point of this blog was to stay in touch and write out whatever thought you were thinking. and so...if you don't write out whatever thoughts you are thinking, you are not using the blog appropriately.

i like being serious and funny at the same time too. i was the first person my best friend from home really confided in. and she says that's because we could have a serious conversation but be laughing the whole time. and that is pretty sweet. and that is mostly how it is with you kids. when we went through shit this semester, we laughed too. t's can make serious funny, but still not take away from ther serious. i have to have a serious conversation with my parents when i get home and i wish it could be funny too, but i know it won't.

i thought i was in love once, but now that i fell in love again, i don't think it was love the first time. i really feel that it was pseudolove. it was just the strongest i ever felt about someone at that point. but i think different people have different levels of love. like, what i feel is love it not necessarily what someone else feels is love. one time when i was little i asked my mom how i knew what a cramp felt like and how everyone knew that everyone felt the same pain when they said they had a cramp. and i think it's like that.

maybe there should be symptoms for love? like...that's how you tell someone is depressed, no? you have x of the amount of symptoms. i suppose no one feels the need to make love that objective, and i don't think it should be, but i'm just saying.

if someone falls out of love with you, but you still love them, how do you fall out of love? like, is it just because they hurt you, and so then you're just done?

i don't really like that bible quote from first corinthians because it is so overused, but i do appreciate it. i believe that love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. i don't know if love never fails. maybe not - marriages and relationships just end when people fall out of love? is falling out of love the same as love failing? iiiii don't know.

there is this john denver song (haha...i know john denver is just funny). anyway, the first time i heard it this dude was playing it acoustic on a guitar and it was sweet, one of those perfect moments you look back on. but the really version is like...opera style. anyway, i really like some of the lyrics for some reason.

"perhaps love is like the ocean
full of conflict, full of pain
like a fire when it's cold outside
or thunder when it rains"

i don't know. that makes it sound so...harsh. but i think love isn't this fluffy thing, i think it requires work and patience and...other things. selflessness and stuff.

i think i have more to say, but i can't find it in my brain.

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